Fitted Sheets and Other Conundrums

I wish fitted sheets had an indicator as to which sides are the short sides.  A little dot, an embroidered line, a giant freaking patch that is impossible to miss that screams, "This Side Is The Short Side, Idiot!"  I was making the bed this morning, cursing the powers that be for the fitted sheet.  Granted, I like the fitted sheet once it's on the bed, but figuring out which side is the short side usually has me getting snapped in the face as I try to put the short side of the sheet on the long side of the bed.  And don't even get me started on folding those things.  Oddly enough, I once got an advertisement in the mail from Volkswagen.  On the mailer, it had detailed instructions on how to fold a fitted sheet.  What a car advertisement and folding a fitted sheet have in common, I'll never know, but the folding instructions were quite good, and I successfully folded a fitted sheet for the first time ever.  And unfortunately, it was the last, as the mailer went missing and I hadn't committed all the steps to memory.  My fitted sheets now get rolled up into something that vaguely resembles a square.  First world problems, right?

I wish there was no such thing as automatic flushing toilets.  I really despise those things.  I have a thing with being too close to a toilet while it's flushing...we've all read those reports about how microscopic poo particles fly into the air every time you flush your toilet, landing on everything within a 5 foot radius or something like that.  That's the reason (in theory) that you're not supposed to have your toothbrush out on your vanity counter-top if it's too close to the toilet.  I don't know the validity of that theory, but it sounds somewhat legit.  I guess.  Microscopic poo particles aside, there are some toilets out there that have such a vigorous flush that they actually splash.  And more often than not, these dang toilets have automatic flushers.  And my issue is this...I can't pull my pants up fast enough and get out of the stall before the toilet is flushing, causing the potential splashing of my own excrement upon me.  Even with stretchy pants that require no zipping or buttoning, I'm still not fast enough to get out of the stall before the flush begins.  And here's another issue...once the toilet is flushing, I can't very well open the door to the stall and sneak out, as opening the door causes me to actually get closer to the flushing, splashing monster.  It's not uncommon for me to find myself pressed up against the door of the toilet stall holding my breath with my eyes closed hoping there's no splash.  And what about those times that I'm having an extending sitting session, and I lean forward a bit for comfort, thereby triggering the automatic flush, splashing my bottom with my own excrement?  Really?  I'm still technically on the toilet.  Perhaps it's a built in courtesy flush feature?  Whatever the case may be, it really stresses me out.  People argue that they'd rather not touch the handle of a public toilet, as there are germs on it.  If I'm going to wash my hands anyway, I don't see the problem with touching someone else's germs if it allows me to open the door the of the stall, pull the flusher handle as quickly as possible, and dash out of the stall before the toilet is in full flush.  That's all I ask.  Just let me have control of the flush.  So now I find myself dreading even more the prospect of using public toilets.  A little part of me dies inside every time I see that little red dot on the wall behind the toilet indicating an automatic flusher.  Again, first world problems.  I should just be grateful that I don't have to dig a hole every time I need to go to the bathroom.

The selling of my belongings continues in earnest.  For the most part, I've been having pretty good luck with buyers.  I've been selling things to people back home in Minnesota, friends here in Flagstaff, random Craigslisters, and the eBay crowd.  I'm actually getting kind of addicted to it.  I rummage through my closet on an almost daily basis looking for things to sell or give away.  Simon and I are taking a trip to Arkansas tomorrow to visit friends, and I think the time away from my selling will be good for me.  Give me a little time away from all the stuff I own.  And it's all stuff.  It's not like I'll regret getting rid of 99% of everything I'm off-loading, but I need to be patient and take a step back before I find myself left with nothing but underpants and some Stephen King books.  Although, there is a market for used women's underpants (so I'm told), so in theory I could be left with nothing but the books.  Something to think about...or not...is the used women's underpants market really something I want to be associated with?  Probably not.  But if the money is good...why the heck not?  Hmm... 

Anyways, my 10 minutes are up.  I think they were actually up a little while ago, but I have a question.  Initially I started this little blog with the idea that I would physically type for 10 minutes and post whatever I could finish in those 10 minutes.  Obviously, I have yet to stay within that 10 minute time-frame, despite the fact that I can type almost 70 words a minute.  But the other day my mom told me that my posts need to be longer because they take less than 10 minutes to read, a factor I hadn't actually considered when starting this blog.  A common complaint I used to receive about my other blogs is that they were far too long, and that people didn't read them because it took too long to get through them.  So my question is this...is 10 minutes too long to sit and read my babble?  Do I stick with the 10 minutes of typing or go for 10 minutes of reading?  Or something in between?  I'm kind of leaning towards the in-between, myself, since I clearly can't adhere to the 10 minutes of typing, but I don't know that I can deliver 10 minutes of reading on a consistent basis.  Perhaps it's a non-issue and I just spent an extra 4 minutes typing out this paragraph...hahaha!  Anyway, let me know your thoughts.

Have a fantastic day!