You might wonder where and why this all started. I'll be the first to admit: it wasn't my idea. It was Meghan. My roommate. She's the culprit. I had the horrible, terrible, idea last year to convince myself, Simon, and Meghan to sign up for the Imogene Pass Run. For those unfamiliar, it is a 17.1 mile slog from Ouray to Telluride, Colorado. 17.1 miles with 5,000+ feet of elevation gain from the start in Ouray over the first 10 miles to the top of the pass with 4,000 feet of elevation loss over 7 miles to the finish in Telluride. It should also be mentioned that the race starts at an elevation of 7,700 feet and ends at 8,700 feet, which is quite high at the pass summit, even for those of us living at elevation in Flagstaff. In a word, it's brutal. But it's also beautiful, and terrible, and awesome, and a huge freaking accomplishment, and randomly, it has the best snacks at the aid stations...M&M's, Pringles, pretzels, strawberries, chicken broth, gummy bears...quite the spread. I'll probably never talk Meghan into anything like that ever again, but that's all right because we did it once, and once was probably enough.
So anyway, we had already finished most of the run, we had already been DQ'd at checkpoint #1 by missing the time cutoff by just shy of 10 minutes (did I mention this was a run? Ha...we didn't do any of that nonsense...we were just trying to survive the thing), and we were looking for something to lift our spirits a bit to get us through that last little bit before the final descent into Telluride. We came around a corner, and there below us was the quaint little town of Telluride, all pretty and cute and completely unaware that we were dying up there partaking in a race that we had knowingly both signed up for and paid to be a part of. Meghan said, "Let's moon Telluride!" So we did. And that's where it all began...kind of.
Oddly enough, the mooning has continued. Sometimes it's me, sometimes it's other people. Sometimes it's my idea, sometimes it's not. Now that my friends know about the mooning, they get a kick out of convincing me to drop my pants in random places for a quick photo opp. I think the common theme of butts in nature has been a good one. Everything else in nature is naked; it seems fitting that the people intermittently ought to be as well. The reaction to the mooning posts has been overwhelmingly positive. But still...it's kind of weird, right? Posting random pictures of butts on the internet?
Not so long ago, I was driving along through Colorado, Simon slumbering peacefully beside me in the passenger seat, when I started to really think about what in the heck I was thinking starting an Instagram page dedicated to butts. And not only did I start this page, but I accidentally followed every single person in my contacts list and from my Facebook page as well. By every single person, I mean past, present, and future bosses and coworkers, hospital administrators, aunts and uncles, cousins, in-laws, high school classmates, college buddies, my parents and siblings, and casual acquaintances. Remember that saying about how "reply all" when emailing is a bad idea? Well, I was beginning to think that "follow all" was a really bad idea as well. And just like "reply all," you can't take back a "follow all." Trust me, I tried...and I freaked out about it for a couple days. All those aforementioned people were receiving notifications that some person named Alice Picklebottoms was following them, and on closer inspection, well, there's her butt right there for all to see in her profile picture. And there's her butt again. And someone else's butt. And a dog's butt. And an open invitation for anyone and everyone to submit pictures of their butts for her to post and for her followers, subsequently, to see. And who in the heck is Alice Picklebottoms??*
I'm too old for a quarter-life crisis (been there, done that), and am too young for a mid-life crisis, so really, what gives? I sat there and I thought about it as the van crept through the road construction in Durango, and finally, the clouds parted and the answer came to me. Back in late high school and through most of college, I was a mooner. I don't even have a good explanation as to why; it was just something that I did. I mooned friends and family members, complete strangers, and once, an entire tour bus in Jamaica. I don't know when I actually quit mooning, to be honest. If I go back through my photos, the moons randomly show up, getting fewer and fewer the further away from college I was. They pretty much disappeared all together sometime around 2008, after a trip with my college buddies to Alaska. I guess 2008 was probably the last time in my life that I spent a significant amount of time around people who knew me as "the mooner," and as I moved away from home and met new people, that part of me just wasn't a part of my life anymore. It's kind of sad, as I sit here and think about it. I think we all lose parts of our free-wheeling selves as we get older, but I'm coming to think that we don't always have to, and that maybe it's never too late to get a little bit of those selves back.
I think for most of my life, I've found butts to be incredibly hilarious. I used to draw butts in my coloring books when I was just a little thing (much to my mom's frustration...she never could figure out why I had such a fascination with butts), and then continued to draw them for years afterwards on random books, friends' textbook covers, little notes that were passed back and forth in class. For me, there's nothing overly erotic or off-putting about butts, they're just there, and when they make a random appearance around an unsuspecting group of people or in a breathtakingly beautiful landscape, hilarity ensues. At least I think so. I'm sure there are people out there who would rather not see my butt, or anyone else's butt for that matter, but for now I'm going with the idea that butts are funny and that I'm not the only person who thinks so.
Anyone who has been following my personal Instagram account since last fall when this all began probably recognized Alice Picklebottoms's rear from my previous posts, but to those who hadn't...well, I apologize if you thought some exhibitionist pervert randomly came across your Instagram account and decided to give you a follow. It's just me being weird, as per usual.
To date, I've had several random tasteful submissions with many more thinking about it (tasteful being the operative word if you'd like to partake). It's not an easy thing to drop your pants and have someone take a picture of your bottom, knowing that that picture will be posted on the internet for all to see. I get it. I don't know why I'm not averse to it, but I'm just not. I think at the root of it, I just find it really silly and unexpected, and that's what makes it fun for me. And really, it's just a butt. There are so many worse things on the internet than a butt or two. To most of the people I've talked to about this, it's just innocent and quirky and I hope that it remains that way. There have been a couple creepers here and there, taking far too much personal interest in Alice herself or in some of the other postings. For those people, the "block" feature has come in pretty handy.
If you find that you've always had this burning desire to tastefully display your tush on the internet, you know where to find me. ;) Keep in mind that all posts are kept confidential unless you want me to share your info...some people care, some people don't.
*Alice Picklebottoms was a silly name that I came up with when Simon and I were first dating, so it's kind of a little inside joke between the two of us. Alice was a name that I thought would be really cute for a little girl...and in later years, a dog. Picklebottoms just kind of came about randomly...probably because I like pickles and butts are funny, but I thought it a fitting alias for this little side project.
hahahaha...
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